Sunday, 28 February 2010

Sign of the times part 3

A recent job ad, once again missing the bleedin' point by about a country mile............

We are a specialist HR publishing company with both online and paper publications. We are looking for an Editor who can do the following:

Most importantly - write features and articles, cover stories, columns, news and the leading letter. (do all the work then)

Then, in no particular order of importance! (the irrelevant exclamation mark is possibly trying to make all the next pile of mind numbingly boring menial tasks sound slightly interesting)

•manage interns & in-house reporters and generate and plan feature/column ideas across all printed products (for in-house reporters read unpaid workies, we like to call them interns cos it makes them sound like they have a fucking clue)

•flat-plan editorial in all publications research background information for articles and fact-check (so back to writing stories again)

•search the internet and other medium for new ideas for features/articles/news etc (steal shit off other people, rewrite the intro and bang your byline on it. Come on, you have 50 pages of edit to fill about a subject so shit even those in the industry don't want to read it)

•sort through press releases (and bin them? or just copy and paste them on a page)

•establish and maintain contacts within the HR/recruitment industry (unlucky)

•set up meetings/interviews (with anyone in particular or just in general)

•interview (both face to face and on the telephone) (as opposed to using smoke signals or a psychic medium)

•track other publications/assess competition (there's competition!!!!!)

•ensure every word is proof-read on time and that all authors' amendments are implemented correctly (authors' amendments! So you need copy approval, oh dear)

•proof-read and edit all publications (after you have written them all I presume)

•sign off all materials and take full responsibility for corrections, mistakes etc. (fall on your sword you blaggard there's an errant apostrophe )

Your character should be - Flexible, hard working, driven and a self starter. (and barmy)

Most of all we are looking for someone who is passionate about writing and will just fit into our team. (not passionate about editing then)

Welcome to journalism 2010 you can be the boss - as long as you realise you are the boss of yourself.

No mention of any money. No mention of online skills.

Oh, and they missed off making the fucking teas.